I don't know
what it is with me lately, but everything I do, hear, or say, I always endure this rush of nostalgia. Like I am right there, like I am finally where I want to be and then I am just sucked back into feeling this way. I hate it; I hate missing something. I hate finding daily reminders of you, hurting because of you, still. I can’t grow a new heart just because I come to the realization of what was never meant to be. I’m not ready to accept it. Not yet. And maybe it’s not even you, maybe it’s just me feeling content and not being used to it. I mean they say old habits die hard, so maybe this “change” I’ve been going through will eventually feel like actual contentment. But even that doesn’t make sense. I’m not used to venting, and to tell you the truth, I don’t know how to. Then again, maybe all those people who’ve ever hurt me, and thought differently, maybe that’s what’s wrong. Not finding peace with any of it.
That’s it; I don’t know how to maintain peace.
‘someday my pain will mark you’
